We are so sorry for your loss!
Losing a child is a life-changing event. No matter the situation or length of gestation, a loss can be difficult to recover from physically, emotionally, and mentally. It is something no parent should ever have to experience and yet approximately 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in a loss, making it much more common than many people believe. While you may have feelings of isolation or despair, please remember that you are not alone! We hope that the information found on this site, the discussion taking place on our forum, the reflections on our blog, and the sharing on our social media will help you on your journey to healing.
It is important to remember that pregnancy loss affects individuals, couples, families, and social groups differently. Therefore, while the suggestions below may be helpful for many, they are not expected to be the answer in every situation. We strongly encourage you to explore multiple avenues for expressing grief, dealing with emotions, and ensuring good mental health.
Tips for coping after a pregnancy loss:
♥ Take as much personal time as you need following your loss; if possible, take time off of work, school, or other commitments. While people may expect you to recover quickly, the reality is that it can be a long process
♥ Do not feel that you are to blame or that you could have done something differently – the loss was not your fault!
♥ Do not worry about being judged by others – pregnancy loss is not something to be ashamed about
♥ Mourn, remember, and memorialize in whatever way feels right to you
♥ It may be helpful to put your thoughts and emotions into writing, either privately in a journal or publicly on a blog; you may also want to consider joining TTH’s discussion forum where you can connect with others who have experienced pregnancy loss
♥ Don’t be afraid to ask people for specific help; if you’re not sure what you need, it’s ok to vocalize that too
♥ Talking with a counselor or therapist may be helpful in sorting through emotions
♥ Talk about your child and/or loss if you desire. Don’t worry that others may be uncomfortable – it is your story to tell & you have every right to do so!
♥ Be careful about turning to alcohol, drugs, or food during your time of mourning as you will be more vulnerable to developing addictive behaviors
♥ Review all medical bills and insurance coverage and challenge anything that does not look right – it can take time and effort, but mistakes are made and catching them can save you money
It is not uncommon for those who have experienced a pregnancy loss to suffer from depression or thoughts of self-harm. In these cases, please seek attention from a grief counselor or therapist or contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.