Congratulations! This is undoubtedly an emotional time for you and one full of uncertainty about what to expect. Here are a few things to help ease your mind during pregnancy after loss:
1. You may be excited yet scared, happy yet nervous, hopeful yet anxious. Pregnancy after a loss is one giant emotional roller coaster from the minute the test shows positive until the time your baby arrives. Concentrate on the things you can control, such as getting enough sleep and exercising, and let the things go that you can’t. If you need to cry, scream, punch a pillow, or eat cake to make yourself feel better, go for it!
2. Announce the pregnancy whenever you are ready. Some people choose to wait longer in case there is another loss. Others choose to share the news early because they want support should something go wrong. There’s no right or wrong way to do it, just whatever feels right to you.
3. Many loss survivors are guarded in subsequent pregnancies and don’t want to allow themselves to get too attached or become hopeful. This is a natural reaction. On the other hand, it’s also ok to be excited! We all process situations differently and what works for one person may not for another.
4. You’ll want to compare this current pregnancy to your last one(s). Try to remember that every pregnancy is different, even for the same woman! Try not to read into every twinge or compare every milestone.
5. Remember that you cannot do anything to prevent a pregnancy loss the same way you did not doing anything to cause the previous one. Go easy on yourself.
6. Talk with your partner and remember you are in this together! S/he likely has the same doubts, fears, and worries as you do. Take this opportunity to create an even closer bond that will help prepare you for the baby’s arrival.