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Friendships & loss

I’ve started to write this post a few times and I’m struggling to find the right words to say. So this post may be all over the place but I am going to try my best and write it because I need to let it all out.

A little while ago I received a pregnancy announcement from a friend who struggled to find the words to tell me about their bundle of joy. When she told me I have to admit that I took it really hard, BUT I was so very happy for her and her husband. I did have to go home and have a good cry afterwards but again I was very happy for them.

A few days later I got a text from my friend, it was the kind of text that stops you in your tracks and you have to sit down to finish reading. But it was a text that I once had to write and remembered all too well. She had gone for an ultrasound the day before and was told that her baby had no heartbeat.

As she was still in her first trimester she hadn’t told many people and she was glad that she hadn’t.

As much as hearing her initial announcement hurt I was glad that I could be there for her afterwards. I remember thinking that I didn’t want to be alone but didn’t want to see anyone after my miscarriage because no one would understand how I felt.

I spent the day with her until her husband could be with her again. We spent the day hugging, talking, crying and just being there for each other. I would have to say that that day was one of the hardest days for me. It brought back so many emotions that I didn’t know were still very much inside me.

We talked about everything that goes along with a loss, all the hard questions and the questions that don’t have a right or wrong answer.

Going through a loss is very hard, but I have learned, both through my friends I live around and my friends from far away places, that you are not alone. There are friends that will always be there for you no matter what.

If you read this, friend, I just want you to know that I love you and will always be there for you.

Category : Amanda , Volunteer Bloggers



March 24, 2014 at 4:18 pm

I am so very sorry that you friend also had to go through this. She is so lucky to have you there for her, not only because you have been though this and can truly understand, but also because you are a wonderful friend who is willing to help out even when it is painful for you. So many T&Ps for you and your friend.

While I’m Waiting

March 25, 2014 at 8:40 am

I’m so sorry about your friend’s loss, not only for how devastating that is for her but also for how it triggers your own personal pain and remembrance. You have been an amazing friend Amanda! It truly takes a very special woman to look past your own circumstances and to be there for your friend in her moment of need. I can only imagine how hard that was for you to hear of her pregnancy and then to later receive her text.

I’m glad that you can be there for her right now and I hope that you two can continue to support each other throughout all that lies ahead in the upcoming days, weeks, months, and years. So many hugs for both you and your friend! You are right, neither of you are alone…there are so many of us going through this journey and it’s beautiful that we can do it together.

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If you’ve come to this blog, it likely means you have suffered a pregnancy loss of some type. We are so sorry you have found yourself here, but hope the stories of life after loss can help you on your road to healing and recovery. Remember, we are all in this together!

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